Release Negative Patterns by Expressing Gratitude!

To continue the discussion on releasing negative behavior/thought/energy patterns...

So when we notice a certain negative energy/emotion/behavior creep into our consciousness, we can acknowledge and accept it and then convert it into something we want to create for ourselves – a positive emotion that we can deliberately start to feel instead of the negative emotion.

The most powerful positive emotion is gratitude.  Gratitude is the birthplace of all creation.  When you are feeling fearful (or angry, sad, etc.), immediately release that fear and replace it with gratitude.

“I’m so scared I’m going to fail this project” turns into “I’m so thankful for this opportunity to learn and grow, and I look forward to the good that will come from it.”

There’s always something to be grateful for (“I’m alive and breathing!”), so when you get down for whatever reason, find something you are thankful for and feel that gratitude.

The key to manifesting something into your life lies within your ability to be grateful for it before it even happens, before you even knowing when or where it will happen.  Be grateful knowing that you will be given the desires of your heart meaning that you will manifest it, it will happen.

This gratefulness creates a beautiful, calming peace in your mind, knowing that all things happen in perfect timing.  True gratitude comes from a deep knowing that divine order is at work in all things in life.  

I guarantee that adding more gratitude into your life will bring you more blessings.  That’s because you will automatically start releasing some of those negative thoughts and energy patterns that sabotage your psyche throughout the day.

When things get rough, it’s really, really easy to focus on the negative.  It’s like stubbing your toe first thing in the morning…things just seem to go downhill from there all day.  One bad thing makes us think of another bad thing until we’re facing this detrimental barrage of negative thoughts.

So the next time you stub your toe, I challenge you to resist the temptation to be negative. (i.e. no bitching).  Instead, take a moment to take a couple of deep breaths and find something, anything to be grateful for.  Say it in your head a few times, “I’m so thankful for…”, while you take a couple more breaths.  (Who knows, that toe-stubbing might have just been a little nudge from above, reminding you to be grateful for that toe.)  Then start your day anew as if that toe-stubbing never even happened.  (Unless you’re bleeding.  Then - peacefully and gratefully - get a Band-Aid.)

Today, I’m grateful for the love that comes from packing lunches for the three boys in my life, the peacefulness I have to myself after said boys are off to work and school, and the warmth of puppy cuddles on cold, quiet days. J

What are you grateful for?

Releasing Negative Behavior Patterns

I’ve decided to do a little mini-series this week focusing on recognizing and releasing negative behavior patterns.  I’ve been struggling with a lot myself as I move into this new routine, lifestyle, and worldview.  Sometimes we have to consciously take the time to remember that we have the power to create whatever we want in our lives.  Therefore, there’s no need for negativity.

We often find ourselves “addicted” to negative patterns.  

There’s something that feels good about trauma, drama, and stress.  Perhaps it’s due to the high-strung, fast-paced nature of our society, but for some reason, we find ourselves craving and devouring it.  That’s why it’s hard to change the channel when The Kardashians is on.  And why we like to gossip.  And why we go through our significant other’s phone, searching for evidence of betrayal or lies.

Anger, Jealousy, Fear, Bitterness, Resentment, Sadness, Pain – They’re all negative emotional patterns that we are choosing to feel.

When we aren’t able to let these negative patterns go, they become a destructive cycle in our lives, always popping up as the roadblocks to our successes.  Most of these negative patterns are going to be so engrained within our subconscious that sometimes we don’t even realize the havoc they are wreaking on our lives. 

When we recognize that certain patterns (ways of thinking, habits, etc.) are no longer serving our good, we have to replace them with more positive habits and patterns.

This is a time when deep self-reflection and self-observation is important.  

We have to realize what those negative patterns are, observe how they unconsciously come out in our every day lives, and then do what needs to be done to fix them and stop the destructive cycle.

To do all this, you must identify the destructive cycles within yourself and come up with some personal ways to release the negative so that you can welcome and create the positive. 

For me, my main destructive cycles are lack of self-confidence (i.e. feelings of unworthiness) and anxious, stressful thought patterns.

Despite my successes and the encouragement and support I receive from others, I really lack in the self-confidence area.  I believe in myself, and I think I kick ass most of the time, but when it comes to following my destiny and having the confidence to become all I know I’m meant to become, I’m slacking a bit.  Then I deal with the almost too-humble side of me that feels I’m not worthy or deserving of all this good the universe has to offer me.  Then, I get into these really destructive, almost self-loathing moods here I’m overcome with so much anxiety and worry that it’s hard to breathe.  I deal with a lot of negative self-talk and don’t love myself nearly as much as I love others.  (Who else has these rollercoasters?? Surely I’m not the only one.)

There are different ways to handle these negative patterns and let them go.  Affirmations are probably the best.  Take everything negative you say about yourself or your situation and turn it into a positive affirmation.

“I’m such a bad friend” turns into “I give light and love to all who are close to me.”

 “I can’t do anything right” turns into “I’m a carrier of the light; all that I think, say, and do expresses divinity.”

Affirmations retrain our brains to have new thought patterns.  The more we say these things about who we are, the more they’ll start to manifest in the world around us.  We’ll eventually truly believe these things and therefore BE them.  (More on this to come!)

Converting energy is another good way to deal with destructive patterns.  All emotion and behavior is energy – sadness, anger, fear, negativity, joy, love, gratitude.  They all have vibrational frequencies and resonate within us.

When we start to feel angry, we feel all sorts of energy moving within us.  Our hearts might start racing, faces might get flushed, hands might get shaky, etc.  We’re filled with high-power energy and we might want to yell or scream or cry or throw things.  Take that energy and put it into something else.  Go clean the house, hit a punching bag, go for a jog – whatever it takes.  Don’t let all that energy boil over in anger, fear, or hate.  

All emotion is energy and all energy can be converted.  We have the power to choose the experiences we have in life.  Making a conscious effort to convert negative energy into something more positive,  you’ll be one step close to creating the life you want for yourself. 

Release destructive habits and patterns and create positive ones!

Living in the Now

One of my favorite books of all time is The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.  If you are a person who has constant anxiety, worries, and fears about what’s going on in your life, you have to read this book.  It teaches how to forget about the past and not worry about the future.  Because, if you think about it, neither the past nor the future really exist.  There is no way to go back in time and change the bad things that happened to you in the past, so what good is focusing on them?  Likewise, you don’t know what’s going to happen in the future, so why worry about it?  (Of course, this is way easier said than done, especially when you’re a worrywart like me.)

The essence of the message in the book is to live each moment in the now with a peaceful mind.  Instead of focusing on what could or might happen, focus on what you want to happen and allow your mind to dwell on it peacefully.  In order to fully live in the now, you have to have an inner peace knowing that you are ok!  Yes, challenges may come along the way, but it is your attitude towards those challenges that determines whether they will have a positive or negative impact on your life.  Positive leads to positive; negative leads to negative.

A large part of living in the now involves surrendering.  “Let go and let God”, if you will.  You have to let go of all of those worries and fears that are occupying your mind, and focus on just BEing.  If you spend more time throughout the day stuck inside your head with your anxieties and what ifs than you do just breathing and being present, then that is your number one problem keeping you from the good you desire.  We must take time to simply BE.  And it isn’t until the last week or so that I’ve truly realized how important this is.  It’s challenging to stay disciplined, but the inner peace I feel after meditating, praying, or saying my blessings is always worth it.  It’s like my adrenaline gets going after my own spiritual workout.    

A simple affirmation that I say daily to help rid my mind of all anxieties and fears is this (which I got out of a Daily Word reading):

“Do not imagine disastrous scenarios; visualize what you want and allow your mind to dwell on that in peace.”

So if you’re going through some hard times and find your mind consumed with thoughts of worry, lack, fear, or negativity, say this affirmation a couple of times to yourself and then take a couple of minutes to put it into practice.  Close your eyes, breathe deeply and slowly, and literally picture in your mind what you want to happen in your particular situation.  Then just sit there at peace for a few minutes - breathing, focusing on that good that you desire.  Allow yourself to feel at peace.  I find that smiling while picturing in my mind all the good I desire works well.  Even if you have to force yourself to smile through tears!  (Which I have had to do on multiple occasions…)  Breathe, listen to your surroundings, and just be.  Take comfort in knowing that you are ok and that all things will work for your good!

This has literally been a lifesaver for me the past several weeks.  Life gets crazy, stressful, and tiresome, but I find that taking a moment to breathe and be at peace helps bring forth positive results in my life.  It will work for you, too!!

Love and blessings,

Kim :)